My sweet, sweet friends…I know how tough it is to be a girl (I’m not playing gender roles, I just have nooooooo stinkin clue what it’s like to be a boy). How tough it is to be young. How tough it is to be insecure. How tough it is to be vulnerable with others and let others see the parts of you that aren’t pretty… How every single morning, you go into the bathroom and your first thoughts are, “Woah. Looking rough.” or “I love how thin I look in the mornings! Why can’t i look this thin all day!?” I know what it’s like to not want the body you were given… Sometimes not even to the extent of wanting to be someone else, but wanting to be as skinny as someone else, or as pretty as someone else, or as fit as someone else, or to be the girl that all the boys want, or just to feel like you’re enough. I know what it’s like to think that all hope is lost, and that no one cares, no one will listen, and the only way out is to hurt yourself. I know how all of those things feel.
I will never be the girl to say, “I know exactly what you mean”, and not mean it. I have walked in it, I have wanted to die, and I have starved myself, ate as little as possible at family events and thrown it all up for the sake of being skinny. God redeems, restores, and sets free. This is my anthem. That Christ died so that I might live. That He hand-knitted me together in my mothers womb. Every curve, every birthmark, and every strand of hair was hand placed by the Father. Every hurt, pain, struggle, and sorrow has gone through the Father’s hands – He had written out all of my days before I breathed a single breath. I won’t go into serious detail about all of the things I have been through, because it isn’t about any of that. What this blog is about is Christ. You guys. Jesus Christ breathed life into my once dead, dry, hopeless, lifeless bones. He made me dance. He sings over me, and I REJOICE. in Him, I have found everything I could ever need. Joy. Peace. Freedom. And I just want all of you to know – He can do ANYTHING. He can restore ANY life. He makes ALL things new! I can’t tell you the amount of times I felt so hopeless, distraught, and lost. But I can tell you this- Jesus makes my every single day worth living. There are absolutely still days that I struggle.. but my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus Christ. His death. His resurrection. His promises. I know He is for me, and I know that nothing can stand against me. No hurt. No fear. No pain. No envy. No lack of self confidence. All of these things cannot stand in the presence of Jesus.
Friends, I love you all so very much. I have a heart for people that is just overflowing wanting to give away love. I don’t know whether or not this is a good thing because my heart has been wounded more times I care to count by people who take advantage of that, but I can’t help it. You are so precious and I will do all I can to communicate that to y’all.
So. When you think about wanting to be anything other than what God made you to be, look in the mirror and say, “I am a child of God. He lives and dwells in me. My confidence comes from Him.” and wink at yourself. Finger guns. Walk away. Keep doing it until you believe it. I’m serious. Because you’re beautiful. He calls you beautiful. You are His. Believe it.
Gentle Kisses and starlit wishes 